Addicted Loved
by Torieoo
Summary: Over coming addiction is hard, especially when it's two people in a relationship full of it. Now, a year later can Adrienne help her still addicted 'boyfriend' Jake get out of this rut he's always in...or is he past the point of saving?(Deadliest Catch fic.)
1. Chapter 1

Adrienne Hillstrand. A normal young girl in the world with problems just like everyone else. She never considered herself special, but she was proud to call herself a Hillstrand. Her father was a very well-known crabber in Dutch Harbor, Jonathan Hillstrand. Her brother, Scott had joined the family pack a while back, and now, Adrienne was slowly being coaxed to go out on the boat.

"No way." She protested crossing her arms staring at the boat in front of her. She'd seen shows like this and knew the risks. There was no way she would survive. Plus, wasn't it bad luck to have a woman on board?

"Don't be such a prissy baby." Her brother laughed teasing her like always. Since she was the younger of the two, she was always the main target of his jokes/ pranks. She scowled at him.

"I'm up here for a purpose and one purpose only, and that is to scope out the scene for potential venues for my friend. Although, who the fuck would want to have a wedding up here? It's cold as fuck." She answered bringing her arms closer to her. She never dressed appropriately for these things. She had on jeans, uggs, and a sweatshirt with her last name on it.

"It's called compromising…something you don't do. And then you wonder why you're single." Scott joked as Adrienne mimicked him with a stupid face. They were in their twenties but bickered like children.

"Both of ya shut the fuck up and help your old man get this shit into the galley." Jonathan said walking up with some bags. The annual stocking up had commenced. Being the weak thing she was, she only carried maybe four bags, while her brother had six or seven.

"Are you absolutely positive you don't wanna come with us?" Andy, her uncle, asked before she parted ways with them.

"100%. I will be in my cozy hotel room waiting for your return but eating and getting a massage in the process." She smiled back just picturing it in her head.

"Alright, well don't do anything stupid, like see Jake." Andy commanded before she left. She hugged him goodbye and wished him good luck and to be safe.

"Okay dad, be careful, don't get hurt this time please, and have a good season. See you guys when you get back." She hugged her father and then her brother, "Bye bitch." She laughed as he squeezed her.

"See ya puss." He laughed back messing up her hair, "And don't go looking for Jake Harris while you're here, he's nothing but trouble!" Scott hollered after her as she got into the car she rented for the weeks she'd be out here.

Adrienne was only 22, but she had a thing for Jake since she was 17. He was of course 27 now, making him 22 when she liked him so it wouldn't have worked at the time. On her 18th birthday, knowing she liked him, he decided to take her out. They got really close, really close in fact and even started dating a year later. Phil and Jonathan never objected since they had been close friends for a ridiculous amount of time, but soon after Jake got into some problems with drugs, and Jonathan feared his daughter would be next.

By the time she was 21, she was addicted to pills. In the two years they'd been together, she had been smoking weed and popping pills around the clock for about a year and a few months. When her father found her, she was passed out on his couch with a pill bottle next to her, she had overdosed. Jonathan and Scot nearly killed him, and both fathers got both of them into a rehab. Adrienne came out recovered, not wanting to ever be in that situation again. Jake however, couldn't stay clean to save his life. In and out of rehab he went.

Even though she was old enough to make her own decisions, Jonathan didn't want his daughter dating his friends' boy anymore. He was trouble, and had nearly cost her, her life. He didn't want it to happen again. She went to college and got her business degree, planning to open a small salon or clothing store. She hadn't decided yet. Everyone was just glad to have their Adrienne back. Although it was always a worry when she came up here, they didn't want her to fall into his clutches again.

She drove along the docks slowly searching for the boat. She wasn't planning on going on it, but once she saw Josh and Jake she felt the need to. What if they found out she was here and didn't come say hello? Phil would probably chew her father out. They were already rocky with eachother due to the whole drug issue. She was surprised to see Jake. She wondered if he was clean or just pretending to be. She could see the cigarette smoke coming out of his mouth as he tied the pots in the same red sweatshirt he always wore.

"To go or not to go…" She pondered to herself thinking of all the possibilities and effects it could have. Josh had always liked her, in a friendly way, and she would've loved to see him, but Jake always held a special place in her heart, and she just wanted him to get better so they could be together. It was a constant struggle to try and get over him.

Finally, she pulled up alongside the dock and climbed out of the truck. It seemed to be all they had available at the time. That's of course the reason she drove so slow. With each step that brought her closer, she got more and more nervous. Her heart started pounding as the voices came into a clear understanding as she approached.

Josh looked up, his scruffy beard and mustache taking over his entire face practically. He too had a cigarette in his mouth and smiled as he noticed her. He waved her over to the side he was working on and slowly helped her climb onto the ship, "Fancy meeting you here." He joked, "What brings you to hell?"

She laughed like she always did when Josh spoke. He was always the humorous one out of the two brothers. Jake had his moments, when he wasn't fucked up, "For some unknown reason my friend wants to have her wedding up here. Guess that's the mind of a future fishermans wife."

"Oh yeah? Who's the guy getting hitched?"

"Matthew…or Mac something….you know I really don't know. Kinda sad now that I think of it." She said to herself almost. She was terrible with names, especially ones that had to do with 'outside' people.

"Wanna come say hi to pops?" Josh asked almost halfway to the galley. She rushed over going through the small door that led inside. She shook for dramatic effect as a signal she was freezing. Josh laughed, 'Hey dad, we have a guest." He announced as they walked up the stairs.

"Josh I don't have time for bullshit, you know I'm very-" Phil ceased his sentence once he was facing who it was, "Well, I'll be damned. Daddy let you over here?"

"No, so don't say anything or I'm gonna get my ass beat." She crossed her arms, "I was passing by and figured I should come say hello since I knew if you found out I was here you'd chew my dad out for not allowing me to grace you with my wonderful presence."

Phil laughed, "Well you've distracted Josh, have you distracted the other one as well?" Referring to Jake. She shook her head no, "Josh get your ass back to work damnit. You're not being paid to talk." Josh obeyed and made his way back on deck.

Jake walked out from the same door Josh did and Adrienne watched as Josh started explaining what was going on. He pointed over to the window and she quickly moved her head, "So how is he?" She finally asked as the boys went back to their work and she could creep again.

"Claims he's clean. I bought a couple of those home drug tests in case he starts acting funny. Plus I'll probably do it every few weeks."

She shook her head, "That's good, it's what he needs." She agreed. She hadn't really talked to Phil since everything had happened.

"How about you? You doing good?" He always cared for her like a daughter.

"Yeah, you know taking it a day at a time. I haven't really wanted to do anything like that since rehab. Of course it gets annoying that I have to tell a doctor I can't have pain meds due to a previous addiction, but you know it happens."

Phil shook his head. He was glad she was doing better, and he wished it would've rubbed off on Jake. He knew Adrienne had to get away from Jake in order to keep herself clean but he always hoped she'd come back to help him, "He misses you." She looked over at him, "He won't admit it, but he needs you."

She sighed, she didn't want to be hearing this right now, "He needs to get help and stay clean for awhile. It is possible and he's only hurting his chances the longer he continues down this path. I can only wait and hope for so long." She answered turning her attention back to the deck.


	2. Chapter 2

The weather was terrible here. Adrienne watched as the snow fell from her hotel room window. It calmed her but worried her all at once. If it was snowing a lot here, how bad could it be out at sea? She got an uneasy feeling in her stomach at the thought of something happening to her family, or something happening to Jake.

"No, you're not doing this Adrienne. You two are broken up. He needs professional help." She said to herself to take her mind off of him. It had been like this since she went to see them. She pulled her robe closer to her as she gripped her coffee mug. She was supposed to be looking at small venues, but instead she was getting snowed in.

The phone rang and she hesitated on picking it up. Only a few people knew her hotel number and half of them were out catching crab. She walked over picking it up, "Hello?" She asked slowly.

"Adrienne?" The line was a bit cut off but she could tell whose voice it was, "Adrienne are you there?"

"Yeah dad I'm here are you okay? It's snowing like a bitch here." She answered trying to hear him better.

"Everything's fine, I figured your anxiety was acting up and I didn't want you freaking out all night. We have some big waves and some strong winds but nothing we haven't encountered before. We're all fine." He assured from the captains chair. He was the only one up there since the crew was all in their bunks, riding out the storm.

"Oh good, I'm glad to hear it." She smiled coming at peace with herself now. Yeah here dad was basically the best at this, but you can never not worry. The Bering Sea is one nasty bitch. She wished her dad safety and then got off the phone with him and getting back to her thoughts. The coffee hadn't kicked in, and she felt herself getting tired shortly after. So she called it a night.

The sun was shining, melting the ice that had been acquired during the storm the week before. Adrienne was making her way down a path to one of the places she was supposed to check out when something in the ocean caught her eye. The Cornelia was making its way to the dock, ready to unload its first catching.

She stopped and hesitated. She knew all too well they'd be here for hours, so she went to check the place out, hoping it wouldn't take too long, "Now this is our ballroom, nothing ridiculously big but fits about 150 people." The woman explained as Adrienne took notes on her phone.

"This would actually be perfect for my friend; they aren't having anything over the top." She smiled, "Now, do you have a bar here already or will one need to be brought in?"

"Oh we don't allow any alcoholic beverages at our events. Company policy.' She answered back as Adrienne mouthed 'okay' to herself and deleted everything she had typed out. There wasn't a need to continue, so she thanked the woman and headed out. Her cell phone vibrated against her pocket and she prayed it wasn't Josh.

"Yeah?" She answered as her friend's frantic voice came through the other end.

"Please tell me you found something!" She cried from the other end practically whining. Adrienne rolled her eyes as she headed to the docks to find the boat. She couldn't help it, it was so tempting.

"I did, but they don't allow alcohol at their venue so I crossed it off the list." She explained as her friend let out a groan and began to bitch, "Hey if you wanted one so fast you get your ass here and do it. There's only so many in this small little town Vi."

Josh noticed her walking up and ranting on the phone. He shook his head at her. She always talked with her hands and always had that sarcastic side to her when arguing. She walked over mimicking her friend with her hand. Josh helped her on deck as she hung up, "Dear God I hate being the maid of honor. Too much responsibility. There has to be this much room and an open bar and if it has everything but the bar it's a no go. Sickening. I'm never letting someone help me get married, I'm doing it myself. Anyway, how's the first load off?"

"Don't know yet, we aren't even halfway done." Josh commented looking back to see the men loading the crab into the bag like carrier.

"Poor crab, if they only knew what getting into those pots meant." Adrienne pouted. She was such an animal lover, no matter what kind.

"Your obsession with saving animals is the reason people go vegan." Josh teased as she narrowed her eyes at him, "I'll never forget when you made us stop for that fucking turtle."

"Hey he could've been really hurt! And besides, I had always wanted one!" She fought back in her defense, "Jake never objected to it."

"Jake was always trying to hit it so of course he wasn't gonna object to you pulling over every time you saw a woodland creature."

"See now this is where you two are complete opposites. You don't give a crap if an animal is at a potential death risk; Jake at least pretended to support me."

"Jake pretended to support what?" Jake asked coming up from behind her. Her entire body stiffened as he came into view. She felt as if her heart stopped. She hadn't seen him up close since the day they broke up. He looked the same, healthier actually.

"Adrienne's pet obsession." Josh laughed, "I'm gonna go check on Dad."

"What's wrong with your dad?" She asked as Josh walked away. She was having a difficult time making eye contact or even looking at him. He sensed it and made him feel bad.

"Hasn't been feeling too good. You know him and his health issues. Makes us worry." Jake explained as Adrienne nodded in response, "Your dad called him a few days ago."

"Saying?"

"I guess they were talking things out. It made my dad really happy to finally be on good times with yours. He missed him."

"Yeah, my dad missed Phil too. I could tell the whole thing was killing him inside." She commented looking out to the ocean. It was so calm right here, but the monster awaited you once you were miles away from shore.

Jake went to speak when Josh came hurdling out from the galley door frantically, "Jake, we need help! Call an ambulance!" He yelled as Jake hurried past his old flame and went to help his brother. Adrienne, taken over with fear, dialed 911 and explained to the operator everything that had happened. What took minutes felt like hours as the ambulance arrived and she directed them to where they needed to go.

She watched horrified as they took Phil out on a stretcher and began loading him into the ambulance. There were tears in her eyes as she witnessed the man who was like a second father to her, be in a serious situation, "What's going on?" She asked

"Stroke." One of the EMT's answered walking passed her. Her eyes widened. Jake climbed into the back of the ambulance as it took off, sirens blazing.


	3. Chapter 3

Phil had died. It was astonishing to everyone and it killed the boys. Jake ran off and locked himself in his hotel room shutting everyone out. Josh was the one left to deal with everything, but Adrienne stayed by his side to help out. It tore her up just as much; Phil was like a second dad to her despite what had gone on.

"I need to uh, I need to call a funeral home or, or something." Josh said trying to collect his thoughts. His mind was in denial and he didn't want to actually believe his father was dead.

"I'll do that if you want." Adrienne suggested as they both sat in the crisis room of the hospital, "Just give yourself some time to grieve Josh. Go find Jake and just, I don't know."

"Yeah go find Jake, the kid is probably getting fucked up in his room right now. He's not gonna be much help but more of a hassle."

She stayed quiet for a second before getting up and leaving Josh to be alone for a little bit. As she was walking down the corridor she could see her father's figure coming towards her. She began to sprint in his direction and hugged him tightly crying, "I can't believe he's gone dad, he was doing so much better." She cried into his jacket. His embrace tightened.

"I know," He rubbed the back of her head as she continued to cry, "Where are the boys? Are they alright?"

She broke away and wiped her eyes, "Josh is in the crisis room right now I left him alone so he could think about everything and Jake is at his hotel room we think doing who knows what."

"Getting high no doubt." Her father mumbled under his breath, she looked at him, "Don't give me that look…we all know it's what he does when he can't handle something."

"Still…his father just died. We all need time to deal with it the way we do in our own way. Josh doesn't need this right now he has enough to deal with."

"I know, I know. I also know that you'll be there to help Josh as much as you can and I'll do the same."

Against her father's wishes, she went to find Jake. Even with the issues that happened between them, he didn't deserve to be alone right now. She pulled her jacket close to her as she knocked on his room door. There was no answer so she knocked again.

"Jake? Jake it's Adrienne." She said hoping he'd answer since he knew it was her. He didn't so she continued to knock, "Please open the door."

Finally he did, "What?" He asked holding onto the door with one hand. She could tell he was messed up. She took a deep breath.

"Can I come in?" She asked

"No, no you can't." He answered not making eye contact with her, "I gotta go," He went to close the door but she stopped it with her foot and her hand.

"Jake, you shouldn't be alone right now. And I'm not the ideal person you wanna see but I'm better than nothing." Her tone changed to more stern. He let his grip go and she walked inside.

"So what now? Here to tell me it'll be okay and that my dad isn't suffering anymore?"

"If that's what you want." She folded her arms and looked at him.

He let out a sarcastic laugh, "That's the problem with you. You always have to turn into some form of sarcasm. My father is dead, you could at least show some sympathy."

She frowned, "I was going to but you jumped down my throat." She replied back to him. He sat on the edge of the bed, "Why are you doing this to yourself?"

"Don't get on my case too. It's bad enough Josh is up my ass about it." He shot back at her lighting up a cigarette.

"Because he cares about you! I care about you! Don't you see that?"

"Sure that's why you just left and went and got help, completely cutting me off."

"You wouldn't help yourself! I had to! I could've died! We could have died! I thought maybe if I cut you off you would have realized you needed help." Her voice got lower as she finished the sentence.

He was silent for a second, "Yeah well, it pushed me deeper into a hole that I couldn't get out of." He replied as she just sat there. He stood up and walked over to the ash tray near the window looking out at the city.

"Josh is down at the hospital…he really needs you Jake…"

He turned back to her, "That's it? That's all you're going to say about us?"

She let out a breath, "What do you want me to say?" She asked not knowing what he wanted from her.

"The truth."

"What truth? The truth about how you need to go to rehab and stay clean this time? Or about how I love you more than anything in this world?" She asked him as he walked over to her. He put his hand on her cheek and she took hold of it with hers. They looked at each other for little before he leaned in and kissed her. She broke away, "We can't."

"Why?"

"Because, I promised myself I wouldn't get involved with you unless you were clean. And the situation right now….it just isn't right." She said letting go of his hand.

"When will it be right?" He asked watching her walk back towards the door.

She let of a sigh, "Honestly, I don't know. Right now just be there for your brother…you two are all you have now…"


End file.
